our friend is dead, let's have a picnic :: carter & marisol

The quartet trio had been back at Redfern for nearing on two weeks now. Every single day of that two weeks had been a challenge. On top of dealing with the grief they were feeling over Jeanine, they had been required to catch up on all the work they had missed the month they were out of school. This meant that though the girls lived right across the hall from one another, they hadn't had much time to actually spend together.

Today that was going to change. The three had decided they would pack up a picnic and go sit somewhere on the grounds of Redfern. Most of their work was out of the way, and Skylar desperately needed some time with her best friends.

So, here they were, sitting on a nice little red checkered blanket in the sun, pulling sandwiches and such out of a wicker basket. It would have been beautiful, had they not been trying so hard to make things feel normal. Instead, they sat on the blanket in an awkward silence.

Were things ever going to feel right again between them?

For about the five weeks following Jeanine's death, Marisol had been suffering from crushing grief and guilt over the fact that she believed that the whole thing had been her fault. And she still believed it. But eventually, the guilt and the grief started to fade. Marisol wasn't sure if she had just gotten so used to it that those emotions felt normal now, or if her feelings had just sort of given out at this point.

She thought she'd welcome the change, but instead she just...didn't really feel anything. She didn't have the energy to. Everything just started to bleed together into one big mess of meaninglessness. She had even started hanging out with Skye and Carter again, much to their relief, but it didn't help. She just tried to get through the social interactions as best she could without any feeling behind it, but she was pretty sure they knew something was way off.

So she sat there at the picnic, eating a sandwich, trying to appear relaxed and content as one would at a picnic. She really just wanted to be in bed right now, even if it was the middle of the day.

It had been a rough couple weeks for Carter, well more like a month and couple weeks. She knew the whole picnic idea was just a way of trying to make things seem more normal, but Carter couldn't help but glance at the empty spot on the blanket. That's where Jeanine would have been sitting.

Marisol was taking it the hardest out of all of them, and it broke her heart. The three of them were at their most vulnerable now, and they needed each other for support and love. Carter and Skye had been trying desperately to reach Mar, but it was just getting worse.

Sadly, Carter nibbled on her sandwich, though she wasn't very hungry.

Well this was going as planned.

Say something, Pen prompted. He was sitting on the corner of the blanket as a field mouse, nibbling on some cheese.

It wasn't often that Skylar had nothing to say, but these last few weeks had been rough. It was especially weird that Marisol was the cause of her uneasiness. After their fight the night they returned to Redfern, the twins had barely spoken a word to each other. Skylar liked to pretend it was because of the work they'd been catching up on, but she knew it was something deeper than that.

But Pen was right. Nothing was going to get better if someone didn't try to make it so.

"How have your eilemaiden classes been going?" Skye asked before pouring some chips out of a bag and onto her plate. Mar and Carter had both settled, but she hadn't yet. That meant she could only take the beginner classes of each eilemaiden, which she had finished two years ago.

It wasn't the beginning of an interesting conversation, but it was a start. Hopefully her sister and best friend would warm up and things would get less awkward soon.

Marisol was staring at the corner of the blanket, completely zoned out, when all of the sudden Barbaro told her that Skye was trying to ask them a question about eilemaiden classes. "Huh? Oh, they're okay, I guess," she answered with complete disinterest. What else was there to say? Even if she didn't have any strong feelings about anything anymore, eilemaiden classes had never been interesting. Who cared about the history of Cuir? "I mean, they're completely boring, but they're going okay."

Maybe next week she'd just skip eilemaiden classes. It wasn't any useful information, anyways.

Carter hadn't been paying attention either, as she absentmindedly nibbled on her sandwich. She didn't look up until Warren nudged her elbow with his beak.

"Oh," she sort of sighed. "It's interesting I guess."

She rested her hands in her lap then, while still clutching her sandwich. Carter probably would have found it interesting too. As long as it wasn't a math class, she enjoyed learning. She prided herself on her good grades, and liked setting a good example for her siblings, but her head had been elsewhere these past couple weeks. She was still studying, doing her homework, and taking notes, but it was like she wasn't absorbing the information. It was making her frustrated. She was never like this, she needed to get herself back together, so she could be there for her identical best friends.

"It's been rough trying to get all of this work done!" she said with a slightly awkward laugh. "I'm almost considering getting help from a tutor!"

Skylar laughed. "Like you need a tutor." Out of the four, Carter was always the smartest. She studied like a fiend, but everyone knew she really didn't need to. She picked up knowledge like most clio picked up bacon.

"All I want to do is settle!" she whined. "At this rate I'll be graduated before I settle and I'll never get to take II or III." The classes were semester long, and the friends only had one more year at RFA.

It didn't make any sense that she hadn't settled yet. Even Mar had settled. They were identical! What the heck!

Then again, Skye's intended eilemaiden, Ughdarras, meant she would have to be around the water. And ever since that night, she wasn't sure about her choice anymore. Maybe fate was waiting for her to make sure.

Skye wrote:"All I want to do is settle!" she whined. "At this rate I'll be graduated before I settle and I'll never get to take II or III."

"Who cares?" Marisol asked. "Those classes are pointless, anyways. You're not missing anything."

She realized that Skye probably didn't care about the classes themselves all that much, but was more unhappy about the fact that all her friends were in them and she wasn't. Marisol didn't get what the big deal was, Skye would settle soon enough and then she'd feel silly about making such a fuss over it.

"'Sides, settling isn't as big a deal as it's made out to be," she added. Sure you gained cool abilities, but honestly life didn't change all that much. You still went to school, had the same hobbies, hung out with the same people.

"I'm sure you'll settle soon enough!" Carter replied encouragingly.

Although she couldn't really emphasize with Skye, she knew how frustrating it must be. Carter had wanted to settle as soon as she could, and finally did last year a few months after her birthday. It was an amazing feeling, to feel the warmth radiate through your body as your true soul started to manifest into something unchanging and true, the power you felt from deep within your core of the element that would bend at your whim. That's why she got this sort of surprised look on her face when Marisol made the comment about it not being as such a big deal. Sure, the eilemaiden classes weren't awesome, but being able to control an element that you chose was an amazing freedom.

"Oh Skye," she sighed. "Don't listen to your silly sister."

Carter had said that lightly, with humor behind it. She wanted to lighten the mood a bit, but also make sure Mar knew she was joking. The mother in her was starting to come out again.

Skylar was still frowning. Her sister was a jerk.

In the past the sisters had laid awake at night in their shared room at home thinking about what their daemons would finally settle as, and discussing which eilemaiden they would eventually choose. Skye had been so excited for Mar when she had finally settled. It hurt her feelings to hear her sister brush off Skylar's disappointment at not settling yet.

You three didn't come out here to fight, Pen reminded her from his spot on the blanket. You know she's just upset. She didn't mean it.

Skylar gritted her teeth and took a bite of her sandwich without saying anything. Pen could think what he wanted, but Skylar wasn't going to pretend that what Mar had said didn't hurt her feelings.

It doesn't give her any right to make me feel stupid for wanting to settle, she argued silently. She's the stupid one. Pushing us all away and making us feel worse.

Marisol saw her sister frown at her comments while Carter tried to lighten up the situation. Her mood was just bringing them both down, and she knew it. They'd probably be having way more fun if she wasn't here.

C'mon, that isn't true... Bar tried to reason with her. He knew--which meant Marisol also knew, deep down--that her friends wanted her around and wouldn't be as happy without her.

Yes it is, Marisol argued. Skye is mad at me already. I should just leave so that they can have a good time. I can make up some excuse...

"Would you two please tell Mar that you want her to hang out with you guys?" Bar asked out loud suddenly. "She won't believe me."

Marisol's eyes widened, before she spun around and glared at her daemon. "Barbaro!" she snapped. Ugh, great. Stupid daemon.

Carter's mouth opened and then closed. Why would Mar ever think that Skye or Carter wouldn't want to hang out with her?? Sure, Marisol had been distant recently, but Carter knew it was just her way of grieving. That's why the three of them were hanging out now! They were trying to get things back to normal again, trying to be happy together again.

"Oh Mar!" Carter sighed. "Why would you ever think such a thing?"

Frowning, she reached out and grabbed Marisol's hand, hoping to comfort her.